Transfer Blues...NOT! March 7, 2016

This week has been AMAZING! We received transfer news on Saturday..and surprise, surprise..SISTER WESTOVER AND I ARE STAYING! (Haha as expected) I can't believe I'm already done with my first transfer. There are so many things happening and I am loving it! My email this week is mostly just going to be about my feelings...no bullet points today.
I have learned a lot about myself the past week. I have learned three mail things. One, I don't think I could be any more blessed. I have been meeting so many incredible people here in St. Michaels. Everyday there is someone new who enters my life, and even if they are only in it for a moment, they are a blessing. I have seen the Hand of God hard at work in my life. There is not a single day that He is not present and providing opportunities for me to grow. Sometimes I think back to the Mormon Message, "The Will of God" and I have to realize that God loves me so much and that because of that love He is going to cut me down. One of the sister in the mission once shared a thought with me.
She said, "So many people say that God does not give us challenges we cannot handle. I disagree. I believe that God gives us so many challenges that we cannot handle. He does this because he loves us and wants us to turn to him for help."
The more I think about this statement the more truth I see in it. Heavenly father Loves us so much and doesn't want us to fail. He knows that we will have challenges, but He is standing there with us the entire time. I recently read a poem called The Race and it relates perfectly to our Father in Heaven. Often times, when I am struggling, I imagine that He is standing over me saying, "Get up! I am right here, Get up!" He wants me to turn to him, but I have to take the first step. I am (we are ) so blessed to have a Heavenly father who loves us so much.
The second thing I have come to realize is that my heart continues to surprise me. I'm pretty sure that by now my heart should be in a million pieces because I don't think it can hold any more love. I have never in my life felt so much overwhelming love for a group of people. I think that wearing this name tag with Jesus Christ's name on it has increased my capacity to love. before my mission I definitely loved people. I cared for them, wanted happiness for them, and would have done anything for them, but that was only after I had gotten to really know them and develop a relationship with them. Being on the mission has changed that completely. I feel that being set apart as a missionary allows me to feel the love that the Savior has for these people. Even if it is just in a small amount. I find myself feeling heartbroken at times as well. I want so badly for these people to see the joy that the gospel brings, and when they don't it makes me sad. I thought I knew heartache, but being here, on a mission...lets just say it puts things into perspective. Haha..sometimes, I would like to just take away their agency for a moment and put them on the right path, but that isn't what Heavenly Father wants.
The last thing I have noticed is that I have so much to learn. Every day I learn something. Whether it be from the scriptures, people we pass by, Sister westover, or members. I am always learning. At first, this realization was a bit overwhelming. I thought that I would never be able to understand things and that I would never be the missionary I needed to be. I quickly learned that even though I do have a lot to learn and I am not the most powerful missionary, I am the missionary that Heavenly Father needs me to be. Yes, I have a ways to go. yes, there is so much knowledge to be gained. And yes, it may take a long time. But as long as I am trying my hardest everyday, then I will become the person I was sent here to be. I am a child of God.You are all children of God. I teach that everyday, but sometimes I forget to remember it myself. Heavenly Father will provide a way for me to accomplish anything I am asked to do, as long as I am living worthy of His help.
Sister westover and I have made it a goal to memorize one scripture every week. This past week we memorized the scripture of 2 Timothy 1:7-8
It says, "For God hath not given us the spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. Be not thou therefore ashamed of the testimony of our Lord."
I have loved this scripture and would like to leave it as a challenge to you. We are given opportunities everyday to share the Testimony of Jesus Christ. DON'T BE ASHAMED! Let your light shine! You might be surprised at what happens when you are ready and willing to open your mouths and share the gospel. God will but the words in your mouth if you are simply willing to open it
I love you all. I can't say that enough. I am so thankful and so blessed.
LOVE YOU!!
Sister Madalyn Hillam :)